I'm not a Toy

You make me feel stupid. I'm not a toy. Can't you just tell me what you really want? I'm trying here. If something changed, tell me. I can't say I didn't expect it. I told you so. I'm not stupid. I know how things go. It's called cynicism. It's handy sometimes.


This is why I didn't want to risk it.

This Isn't Goodbye :)

I've been suppressing some certain emotions from bursting to the surface. Most of the time I am successful...but sometimes I am not. A few weeks ago it was easy. However, time is against me. Lately, it's been getting harder to keep those feelings at bay. Today, I had the first of a series. I couldn't help it. It just dawned on me...no, rather, it just crashed down on me that we only have a few DAYS. I don't know how to spend it especially since I have school and training. I don't want you to leave and yet I want you to leave. [coz it will be for your future and you'll be fulfilling your goal of finally living on your own haha]

I know we'll stay friends forever. I know we'll never lose touch. I know that I'll be there for your graduation. I know a lot of things...

I know that we've been friends since grade 5...that we were the ones who started writing our own 'novels' that have silly plots that were entwined with our favourite movies. I know that it was us against the world except for that time in grade 6 and 7. I thought it was the end of our friendship but you sewed us back together with superglue this time. :) I know that throughout our highschool lives we were there for each other. We became sisters...not biological but you get the point haha.

That time when we ate in John and Yoko was where it really hit me. That time when you, Auti, and I laughed with a beat and we stopped at the same time pa... priceless XD. When we teased Auti about...being herself haha. When we shared 3 meals and split the bill hating-kapatid. When we ate dessert in the dessert place right beside where we ate dinner. When we said goodbye and hugged each other...I realized that the friendship we had was the most perfect that it can be. The fights that we had only made us stronger.

I'm going to miss us laughing together at the things only we think are funny no matter how corny they are. I'm going to miss our silent laughter and how we mimic how other people laugh. I'm going to miss seeing your face every morning when the school year starts. I'm going to miss getting ready at your house. I'm going to miss taking goofy pictures with you and how we absolutely don't care if we look ugly. I'm going to miss how you're so frank. I'm going to miss your steak baon complete with A1 sauce. I'm going to miss your habit of fixing your glasses. I'm going to miss everything.


I wish were born sisters haha. :)

This isn't goodbye, nics. imma miss youuuu

LSDC

Okay, I signed up for La Salle Dance Company last friday super last minute. It was weird coz it was 5 sharp when I got to La Salle main and I thought to myself that this was it; it's not meant to be. but the guards were nice enough to let me in since I was there earlier to sign up. [They were closed at the time so I had to come back after my classes were done] And so, I walked to Yuchenco Hall feeling apprehensive and scared. I mean, I'm signing up to join an actual DANCE CREW. One of my many dreams haha. And I don't think of myself as a very good dancer. Not good enough anyway for stuffs like crumping/ freestyle/ breakdance/ and everything else. I mean, the only training I've had was in cheerleading that had some hiphop and jazz flavor. I would've taken classes but I don't know- things just don't happen. XD So yeah, and I've heard that I'm not really the hip-hop-y type. I'm hoping I can prove that wrong. I mean, I've always wanted to be that girl on step up 2 minus the bad acting. hahaha.


Thanks to Nica and Paula yesterday for helping me out with the choreo. :) Your comments mean a lot

Busy Bee

I've been so busy with school. no joke. i have less subjects than what i had during highschool and yet i can't find time to relax, go online, talk on the phone, visit friends, ETC. [no, not the channel hahaha]

So I can't regularly update my blog :( But anyways, i shall share:

BLOCK FMA2

Joanna, Jenn, Princess, [i forgot her name :| i'm sorry!], Miguel ''Little Boy'', Hannah, Josh, Erin, Edward, Rita, Cara, Louis, Saira, Me, Pre, Thea, Russel, Ram, Rizza, Kevin, and Ken. They're just some of the people in my block haha. apparently it was Panda Day XD